days drag on, trudge with their heads hanging. days seem endless when all you do is sleep and wake, chokeful of white porridge and white pills.

so the fever has come and gone, but not really, since it has degenerated into a painful ear infection, numbing the area, like a dying ghost who refuse to let go, clutching and clinging for dear life, clawing its way through the veins, eyes bulging PLEASE! LOOK AT ME!.

Degenerating into this form, I wish it will just go away. Above the inconveniences and pain is the deeper fear of being marred, dragged down, and going deaf.


The call to chop it all is mine, after all. Cut it off, once and for all. This tip-toeing around meagre strands of communication is ridiculous--and to be very honest, getting downright bloody irritating. What's all the hemming and hawing about doing it PC-style?

But am I making excuses, taking the easy way out?


And worse is that he can't be here, kidnapped by three exams. The asking ransom is 24 hours, paved with ceaseless notes, sheets after sheets after slides after slides.

Dear, dear, these two? three? days have been unbelievably loooooooooong.


i wish i had the strength to study more. and there goes the hope of presenting a big, fat--and very grand--birthday present.