:: drama at home ::

carrie and lizzie woke up late into the morning. everyone had left for work and school, and they had to make breakfast themselves. it was a wonderfully lazy start to the day.

"aw man the floor is so dusty."

"it's dirty!"

"gee.......vacuum?" carrie suggested with a languid stretch. she yawned and admired herself in the full length mirror, and, turning to lizzie, continued, "you know i've got a project due tomorrow. and i haven't started..."

"jeez alright..........i'll vacuum...." lizzie growled and gave carrie a playful shove.

lizzie overdid the doughnuts in the toaster and the top was burnt. it was terrible bread. they got through breakfast and soon they were having fun cleaning up the house. they decided that the current vacuum cleaner needs to go because it was not doing its job as a cleaner. halfway through the house their working mummy came home. she was tired, beat, and totally glad to be back in the comforting haven of home. oh you girls are vacuuming she said, extremely pleased. after changing out of her clothes she sat down to a cuppa hot tea and snacks with her daughters and enjoyed the slow traffic of the afternoon. mom, the girls uttered, i think the vacuum needs to go. it's not working. can we use the new one, please? their mother looked at them sharply and said, alright comeon give me the cleaner i'll empty it so it'll be like new. she muttered and cursed under her breath while she emptied the bursting cleaner in the spick and span hall. lizzie saw red. she flung the trunk of the cleaner to the floor and stomped off. carrie watched and tried to think of something to lighten up the mood again. she took over vacuuming, only to discover that the whole house has been cleaned already. their mother then proceeded to the bedroom to take a much needed nap, leaving the girls to themselves, again.

let's order pizza, they said. yeah, i feel like doing pizza too. seafood? hawaiian? yeah. medium? large? regular? medium. alright. carrie dialled 62410241 and the two of them then sat at their tables to tidy things up. the pizza arrived shortly, at the same time their mother woke up to find the sky overcast and the rain clouds threatening to explode. she started to curse and nag and scold and lecture. the members of the household are never reliable. the house is synonymous to a hotel. she is the one doing all the housekeeping. she keeps the house in order. no one else lifts a finger. lizzie and carrie rolled their eyes. what's new. they proceeded to eat their pizza and tried to renew their former excitement. slam slam slam in the kitchen. carrie and lizzie put down their pizza and went to the kitchen. their mother was slamming clothes into the laundry basket to be sorted out into their respective drawers. they tried to help but their mother brushed them off angrily but they persisted in helping to hang up the clothes. lizzie brought the clothes out into the balcony to dry off since they were not completely dry and carrie told her to come let's eat the pizza. seconds after they sat down to resume the feast their mother stomped into the balcony to take all the clothes to stuff them into the respective wardrobes. carrie got up and told her mother mom those aren't dry yet we'll put them in later. her mother gave her a vicious look and her eyeballs threatened to bulge out of their little sockets and growled tightly they're dry i'll put them in. i'll help you, carrie said, and reached over to take the hangers from her mother's hands. lizzie walked in and stood beside them, wondering what she should do to help. their mother was frenzied and grabbed the hangers back angrily, i'll *fucking* put them in since i'm *fucking* already here and i *fucking* have those *fucking* hangers in my hands i'll do the *fucking* job myself. of course those *...* were not uttered as she prides herself too highly to use such demeaning language, and her children are *gasP* not legal yet to listen or watch r(a).

carrie tried to snatch the hangers back again, seeing her mother in obvious anger and annoyance.

her mother grabbed them back and shrieked what the *fuck* are you up to?

carrie was up to her head with crap like that for months and she exploded back what the *fuck* are YOU up to?

her mother screamed back i'm putting back the clothes that what i'm *fucking* up to. so that i can cook your *fucking* dinner and then go and bathe and then go and sleep!

well *fuck that* just throw them all away!

FINE i'll throw every *fucking* thing away in future!

well good! and don't bother about dinner we don't want to eat!

FINE i'll just cook for myself then!

what the *fuck* are you screaming for!

well what the HELL aRE yOU screaming FOR!?

coz you're screaming so *fucking* loudly that's why!

you?!!?!?!? you not loud enough!?!?!!?!?

a shouting war had ensued. carrie felt dams of tears pool in her eyes and two large humiliating drops slide down her flushed cheeks. she turned away with a hanger in her hand to go out of the room. lizzie took the rest of the hangers our to their shared bedroom. the fat burdened rain clouds had burst and the sky was now starting to pour. carrie felt a primitive urge in her stir. she felt the pounding need to get away. she flung down the hanger and ran to their study to look for her keys.

found them.

she opened the door. she stepped out. she flung the grill-gate back so hard it rattled in its hinges and threatened to come apart. she ignored lizzie's faint surprised hey. the rain tempted her. lured her. it was like a drug that carrie had to consume. she took the elevator down and ran into the peltering rain.

the sky was pouring in torrents now. it's as though the clouds were weeping with her. for her. carrie didn't know where she was going, she didn't really care. she just wanted the hard, bitter droplets to crash down on her incessantly and continuously. she wanted it to hammer away her hurt and pain and anger and tears. the cold of the wind cut into her flesh and her heart. she wore little -- a cropped tank top and fbt shorts. the wind pierced her relentlessly. the rain blinded her. she didn't understand. she felt like she was thrown into the middle of a roaring ocean with no safety harness or float. she felt like she was drowning. she felt an implosion greater than the exploding downpour around her.

back at home, lizzie was at a complete loss. she knew carrie was hurt and terribly upset, but she also knew that she wouldn't do anything completely irrational like run into the middle of the road. she wasn't sure about her mother. her mother was capable of insanity when she gets swept up by her emotions. lizzie wasn't sure if her mother wouldn't jump or smash her head into glass. she stayed at home and tried to calm herself down.

she sat down and ate some more pizza. the piping hot feast tasted pathetically bland.

their mother was still screaming in the background. i know all of you hate me. i'm such a thorn in the flesh for all of you. all of you can just *fucking* stay at home. none of you need to go. I WILL GO. i know i'm hateful. i know you all would love for me to go. I WILL GO.

lizzie was beyond frustration. she simply didn't give a damn anymore. she wanted to go look for carrie. it was pouring and she was worried. she took the keys and was leaving the house when their mother came into the hall and demanded where carrie went. i don't know, lizzie said, out i guess. message her! lizzie didn't know if carrie brought her phone, and when she didn't get a reply she affirmed that carrie left without her phone. her mother got frantic. they left the house together to look for carrie in the thundering rain, which is fast becoming a mild drizzle.

carrie was tired of walking. she just wanted to sit down and think. and cry, if there were any more tears left in her. she found a bench and sat down, drawing her knees up to her chest. tears and rain were one and the same, and she couldn't tell one from the other. her emotions began to calm down, and so did the rain. soon the only remnants of the thundering pour were the drizzles that persisted and the puddles on the floor. curious passer-bys stared unbridledly, but no one stopped to ask. that was good. carrie wanted nobody.

carrie became aware of her skimpy dress and the gaping foreign workers who were roaming around in her deserted neighbourhood. she got up and found her way back home. many scenarios crossed her mind, and she steeled herself for the consequences of her impulsive behaviour. she decided that silence would be the best response.

and she had silence. when she got home, it shocked her cold system that nobody was home. she deliberated for a while, her hunger veered towards the enticing pizza on the table. still, rational as she is, she knew she had to take a bath. she was too wet to sit down in those marbled chairs and dirty them. she debated because she wanted to be seen parading around in her wet clothes when her mother got back. she wanted to be seen eating pizza in her drenched, wretched state. it was emotional blackmail and she knew it. she wanted to do it. she went to the bathroom. she stood admiring herself in the mirror. she thought about how difficult things would be if she were to fall sick. thought of all the deadlines she had to meet these two weeks. no. it's too childish. she peeled off her clothes and stood under the hot shower. it was a strange sensation, the feeling of baking hot water on her cold frozen skin.

(to be continued)